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Poser. Faker. Pretender. Defense Mechanism. False Self.
These are the costumes we wear to the party of life.
Where they come from and how we got so skilled at this masquerade is content worthy of a book or books.
Personally, as a non-perfectionist, I got pretty good at wearing “The Performer” mask because I was concerned that people might see me as shallow or unprepared or whatever was in my imagination that wanted to protect my ego on any given day.
Eventually, I came face to face with my mask - so well developed I didn’t recognize myself in the mirror. I asked myself, “Is dying to this false self worth it in order to reveal my real self?”
As I developed a trust in God, it spilled over into a vulnerability before men.
It was then that I was able to answer the question: My real self was worth dying for.
Whenever I want to dust off any number of masks, I remember this answer.
PORTAL TO HEAVEN: Jesus had to change names. With that came the face of a disciple.
So I will call you Peter, which means "a rock.”…Jesus said, ‘Now here is a genuine son of Israel—a man of complete integrity.’ Nathanael said to him, ‘How do you know me?’…James son of Zebedee and his brother John (to them he gave the name Boanerges, which means "sons of thunder”)
Matthew 16:18 CEV, John 1:47,48 ESV, Mark 3:17 NIV